We Are All More Alike Than We Are Different
We Are All More Alike Than We Are Different
Two weeks ago, I hosted my fourth retreat. Every time that I host, I’m reaffirmed that we’re all more alike than we are different. We all want to be loved and accepted for who we are, not who we are trying to be. I watch guests that don’t know anyone show up on the first day, anxious and nervous. I watch guests that came with a friend show up on the first day, anxious and nervous.
Meeting new people can be hard and scary at any age, but it seems to me like it gets harder the older we get. The more we fall into the routines of our responsibilities, the less likely we are to step outside of our comfort zones.
Maybe it’s because we get comfortable, and living within our comfort zone is easier and requires less effort. Perhaps it’s because with age, comes more negative experiences full of rejection, humiliation, nonacceptance or even hate, all of which can be deeply traumatic.
A normal response to any situation that caused suffering or pain is to avoid future situations that may result in a similar unpleasant experience.
But at what cost?
I’ve seen extreme situations that result in isolation. I’ve worked with clients that couldn’t think of one person in their life that actually loved them. Or clients that thought they had people in their life that did love them but they still didn’t feel comfortable being vulnerable with them.
I work with these clients to get clear with what’s actually true or not. Meaning are their assumptions about the people in their life actually true or are they actually stories that they made up on their own?
It’s usually the latter that is the truth, and they are actually living with some limiting beliefs about themselves. Whether it’s their unworthy of love, too scared to get hurt again, or whatever other reason they have, something is holding them back from living the life they want.
Until you love yourself, you can’t ask the people in your life to love and treat you the way that you desire. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard to love yourself, and it’s something I personally struggle with. One of the tendencies of the mind is to doubt the positive and cling to the negative, this makes loving yourself really hard. But I think it’s work worth doing.
There’s been a lot of sad things in the world lately and I truly believe this is the answer.
Will you join me in the quest for self-love?
Images by Personal Branding Maven Elise Kutt at Mod Bettie Portraits
My name is Anna VanAgtmael, and I am a certified yoga instructor with a passion for yoga, travel, and connecting with others.
I believe in trying everything once. My values lie in collecting memories over things. Though we desire adventure and authentic experiences, naturally our fear holds us back.
My ambition is to inspire and encourage you to unmask your fears and jump into the unknown.
Anna VanAgtmael | Yoga Enthusiast | Travel Designer